Parker Lewis Can't Lose

Premise

Episodes

Characters

Main

• Parker Lloyd Lewis – A smart guy with a penchant for garish shirts and cutting classes, Parker usually has a plan up his sleeve, and in turn it usually involves outsmarting someone else. Plans put into effect begin with the command: "Synchronize Swatches." Parker is famous for his catch phrase, "Not a problem," which he often says when faced with trouble. He and his two "buds" have their high-tech headquarters hidden above the gym. In the final season, Parker finally settles down with one girl, Annie, and appears more mature and less reliant on his "Not a problem" attitude.
• Michael Patrick "Mikey" Randall – A rock and roll rebel without a cause and by far the most emotionally driven of the trio, he often quotes or paraphrases famous songs. Mikey at one point considered dropping out of school at Santo Domingo HS when a prank by Shelly causes Mikey to unknowingly play a love song he composed for a girl for whom he had feelings to be broadcast before the entire school, resulting in embarrassment for him.
• Jerry Steiner – A stereotypical nerd, in the first two seasons, he wears a trench coat from which he produces almost any object imaginable, apparently fixed inside with Velcro. He addresses everyone formally by last name, e.g., "Mr. Lewis", "Mr. Randall", and even "Mr. Kubiac", or collectively as "sirs". At the end of the credits of the pilot episode, Jerry hid in the locker next to Parker's, talking endlessly to Parker through the door, not knowing that he had left, causing him to plaintively call out: "Mr. Lewis? Mr. Randall? Mr. Phillips? Hello?" One notable episode dealt with Parker and Mikey confiscating Jerry's trench coat for him to stop hiding and get to know a female nerd as a potential girlfriend.
• Grace Musso – Principal of Santo Domingo High, she is Parker's arch-; at, she is said to be in her mid-thirties, but is actually older. She wants to get Parker expelled. Often, she breaks the glass on her office door when she makes her distinctive "thumb swoosh" gesture. She has a racy side which is sometimes exposed; her turn-ons include beards and large hands. She was portrayed as a spinster at first, but seemed to have a skill in men, one time having dated an officer of each of the armed forces. She has many secrets which she would rather be kept quiet, such as living in a $600,000 house on a $38,000 a year salary, which Parker uses as the necessity arises. However, Parker's blackmail ideas have sometimes backfired on him; one of his actions resulted in Musso's suspension. When a tougher principal is brought in to replace her, Parker cannot handle it going "from bad to worse", and works to get Musso reinstated.
• Shelly Ann Lewis – Parker's other nemesis, she is his little sister, who attends the same school as a freshman. She likes to manipulate teachers and parents to her benefit and tries to get Parker into trouble. Shelly also teams up with Musso if she sees a chance to ruin Parker. Most of the time, she is on friendly terms with Jerry and the two seem to end up in a constant relationship at the end of the series. Her favorite saying is: "My brother is a dead man!" whenever she finds an opportunity to bring Parker into an embarrassing situation. She has a tendency to call out "Mom!" when Parker gets one over on her, as seen at the start or end of various programs.
• Martin Lloyd "Marty" Lewis – Parker's father, he owns a video rental store called Mondo Video with his wife, and is helped by Parker and Shelly on weekends. He tries hard to keep some of the coolness that he had in his own school days when he was a self-described "young hoodlum". It is shown that he graduated from Santo Domingo High School, as well, and had two friends who were similar to Jerry and Mikey. Martin also had played mean pranks on Grace Musso, who had been a classmate of his at Santo Domingo, hence explaining Musso's resentment of Parker. The role of Mr. Lewis was played by Sherman Howard in the pilot episode.
• Judy Lewis – Parker's mother, she can be loving and gentle, but if her family is threatened, she is ready for battle.
• Francis Lawrence "Larry" Kubiac III – Known as "Kube", at tall and in weight, he is built like a dinosaur with a brain to match, yet with a surprisingly sweet disposition. While walking, Kubiac causes earth tremors. His favorite line is, "Eat now?" In the series' beginning, he was initially introduced as a pure bully, aggressive and hostile towards other characters, but within a few episodes, his character was quickly changed into a more benign and friendly one – a "gentle giant", and he quickly became a helpful character who would often help Parker and his friends in their schemes. Later, it becomes revealed in a moment of confidence with Parker that Larry is more intelligent than he appears and his dim-witted persona is merely an act.
• Franklin "Frank" Lemmer – Principal Musso's ultra-conservative sidekick and "lapdog" with vampiric tendencies, he has been in school 16 years, wears black, and seems to have a telepathic connection to the principal and is obsessed with war, strategy, and politics. Musso can summon him with a dog whistle. He is able to teleport at will. Despite him largely being an adversary to Parker, at one time Parker actually agreed to help Frank Lemmer win over a girl named Denise, who turns out to be a blood relative of Grace Musso's. He was absent in the show's final season.
• Annie Faith Sloan – She is Parker's love interest from the middle of the second season to the show's end. When Parker's parents were out of town one weekend, he invited Annie to his house with the intent to go all the way, only for Kubiac, Mikey, Jerry and others to show up to his house unannounced all at once and ruining his plans, but ultimately grateful when he learns Annie values abstinence.

  Recurring

• Dr. Norman Pankow – The principal of rival El Corrado High School with a doctorate in penology, he is Musso's primary adult rival and a devotee of the sculpting of bonsai trees. As tough as Musso is, Pankow is regarded as much worse. One of Parker's stunts had caused Musso's suspension; when Dr. Pankow replaced her Parker admits he got more than he bargained for and needed to bring about Musso's reinstatement.
• Nick Comstock – Manager of the Atlas Diner during the second season, he is very attractive and possesses a supernatural ability to help people with their problems, often dishing out sage advice to Parker.
• Bradley 'Brad' Penny – He appeared in the show's final season. He works as a bricklayer, and is athletic and good-looking. Parker sees him as an nemesis, but Brad often only wants to be friends, though misunderstandings come between them. Shelly is intrigued by him.
• Coach Hank Kohler. Joining during the show's final season, Hank Kohler served as a father figure for Larry Kubiac and the new owner of the Atlas Diner, which he finally loses in the show's final episode, "The Last Supper". He is obsessed with Grace Musso, who is completely repulsed by him.

  Broadcast and syndication

Home media

Awards and nominations

Internet support

Legacy

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